what's pathetic is how much i look forward to a simple walk tomorrow. i can't just walk without a purpose. i need to be going somewhere. tomorrow i have somewhere to go and i can't tell you how much that excites me.

i just feel so trapped. so filled up with this place. there is a ridge, barely visible from my prison. i could walk there. if i leave now i could make it there by nightfall, i could live under the night sky warm myself by the campfire and eat by my prey.

The Moment

The clock ticks,
i think of you,
tick,
your smile shines,
tick,
your hair waves in the wind,
tick,
why is it taking so long,
tick,
to see you again,
tick,
i want to be,
tick,
close, and hold you here, look into your eyes,
tick,
kiss your lips and hear your voice. remind me again why aren't we living together?
tick,
this is taking to long. my heart hurts, my body yearns.
tick,
what is wrong with this clock!?
tick,
it must be wrong!
tick,
tick,
tick

To the Swells

The oceans might and roil,
turning in swift anger and fury,
testing ships, and men, souls.
will they go on?
can they?

the storms come,
and the storms go,
but man will always sail.
to see the white fury,
or its peaceful glass,
she calls us back to her unwelcoming arms.

at sea with brothers,
unfurl the sails,
set off, le'go the anchor,
and sail away,
a new port every day.
Her arms await.

the Nomad

i lay tonight in the same bed,
to the same people and smells,
the sounds and sights unchanged.
i lay tonight again the same,
nothings changed.

i miss the times when we travelled long,
the sun was hot and we were dry,
times were hard but we fought harder,
to lay every night sore in every muscle and bone,
to travel where ever your heart wishes.

when sun set, we slept,
when the sun rose, we awoke,
when it rained we hid,
when the sun showed we moved on,
when fire burned we sat, story and song both sung.

i laid every night in the same hammock,
but the people and smells were new,
the sights and sounds grand,
i laid every night awed by the beauty of yet another piece of heaven,
everything changed, everyday

The burdens

Rain tapped lightly on the window. The man stared at his own reflection without expression. The gray skies gave the blue walls a boring hue and the only source of color came from the half drained orange juice on the table behind him. He sat on a chair he had turned toward the window, his disturbingly skinny feet dangling off and his jeans loosely fitting. He wore a white wife beater and had a farmers tan contrasting his light hair, the Eagle, Globe, and Fouled Anchor gleaming on his shoulder.
Time had no meaning while he sat, his body aching to move, but knowing he can't. The front door clicked open and the marine turned his head toward the sound then lifted himself on his arms and slid into a chair beside him then sneaking a swig of whiskey from his flask in his pocket.
"Hey honey" she called clinking her keys on a solid surface. The woman was brunette standing average height and was wearing no make up but was still a pretty girl. She carried two plastic bags filled with groceries and came from the front hallway and stood for a moment in the door to ask "Paul are you OK?" seeing his expressionless face staring at the plate of food she cooked for him almost two hours ago.
"Yeah just tired."
"You say that every day. What's wrong hun?" She asked sweetly and with obvious concern.
"Just worried" he lied again. When she gave him a questioning look he added "it's their first deployment without me." She accepted this with a sigh and went to the kitchen putting up groceries. He couldn't help but feel guilty. Poking the cold bacon on his plate he sat silently.
She returned shortly poptart in hand and ate quickly then took her trash and Pauls plate to the kitchen to clean it. She back into the room now for a third time saying something about a spongebath to which he replied that he would do it himself, trying to hide his pain and hurt pride.
She stopped and looked at him. "Remember what happened las-" she was interrupted by a telephone ring. She scurried to the next room and came back in a rush saying something about someones water breaking. She rolled an I Love You off her tongue then left, locking the door behind her.
After a few minutes Paul picked himself off the chair and sat in the wheelchair, then rolled to the garage and grabbed out his old shaving kit. Then after much effort and a long period of time he climbed the stairs to the only full-bath in their condo.
He turned on the water to the tub and pulled out his old razor and began cleaning it. When the tub was finished filling he took another swig of his flask and climbed in, razor in hand. His last thoughts were of never being a burden again as the water turned red and his soul drained from his eyes.

The Hunt

The jungle was silent as he ran, his labored breathing the only sound. Very little light sifted down to the ground leaving him able to see the path carved out for him but unable to see small sticks or animals. A crunching sound emanated from a nearby tree and he knew the thing was closer. Yon ran even faster putting every ounce of his strength into his speed and doing well with it. In another life he might have been an Olympic athlete, had he not been an archeologist. And further still he might have remained one had he simply kept up with the guide.
He did not believe him when the small framed man with many scars told him many evils lived in this forest waiting for a weak soul to take. It was just myth he had said to his students but no look at him being chased by- the chase! He refocused his efforts realizing he had just begun to slow. Yon had been running for half a hour now and that he couldn't continue to do so for much longer especially at this pace.
The professor was correct. After another seven minutes at this impressively break-neck speed, Yon could no longer feel his legs. How big is this jungle? Suddenly another crunching came from yet another tree and Yon instinctively looked behind him in terror, but went tumbling to the ground over a small branch, planting him head first on the soft, moist dirt.
The creature was no-where to be seen when the professor awoke. He didn't know if it had been several hours or less than a second. Peering around he was puzzled. After a few more grueling seconds of gathering his thoughts he heard several voices coming from further up the trail, so yon tried to stand to greet them but a sharp and monstrous pain shot up his leg. So he called out once but remained seated.
The others found him sitting a massive gash running the front his shin revealing his bone and mixed with dirt. The asked why he ran so fast just barely above the excited voices of his students.
"I thought i saw... I was looking for you all."
The guide looked at him closely. Almost suspiciously. Why was he looking this way? the professor thought to himself. In the end though, the guide made a splint out of nearby wood and with the help of the young students carried him out of the jungle. The professor and students were airlifted out that night. Yon was treated at a nearby hospital while his students returned home where he joined them after a month.
He was over joyed to see his wife again and his brush with death had awakened a new passion in them both, so later that night he told her he would stop going to the dangerous digs to be with her and maybe... start a family if she would allow it. She did.
How ever when the two got home Yon could feel something change in him. He had a new urge he had never felt in his life. It was primal, simple. It awoke from the inner core of his body beyond that of even sex drive. It seemed to eminate from a joy he had felt in a time before and longed for once again. A time he had never expereinced.
When his wife went to sleep it seemed to speak louder. It spoke to him unceasingly in his dreams as well showing what it would be like to take that step, to seek that thrill, but no he could not do something so... wrong, so evil. He had long ago accepted it as a fact of the world that good and evil are only words but this. this sickened him yet enthralled him. This fact only made him long for it more.
after four months of thoughts whispered into his head he could stand to be away the hunt no longer. He drowned his wife while she napped in the tub and pretended to be at
 the grocery store. His wifes pregnancy unbeknownst to him gave him an air of credability along with his recent scrape in Argentina.
But it was not enough. He still wanted more. Needed more. When he was alone with a student one day he pounced. Hit the boy over the head with a chair knocking him to the ground. The boy being on the wrestling team reacted the moment he touched the ground by rolling to the left and sweeping Yon's leg, hitting his head on the way down. Yon bled out on the floor before his student could get help.
Later the boy went home to his parents to deal with the loss of his favorite professor. Then it awakened. The longing. The need for the hunt.

Brothers and Sisters

She couldn't help but be excited although she had told herself not to be many times now. But today is the day! It was finally happening she screamed in her head used every bit of strength she had not to do so where others could on this crowded New York City street. The sun had just set on this happy day. It was over she cried.
She went to the newest fashion store and picked out the most exotic and beautiful dress she could find. She next went home and began carefully putting on her makeup in the three room apartment she owned. When she finally had on the exact right amount she stepped away from the mirror. Her skin appeared flawless without the makeup and she smiled a wide grin showing her large canine looking teeth. Suddenly aware of this she stopped and made her lips remain over her teeth.
The dress she now wore was small and black, and seemed to simultaneously ooze sexuality, beauty and class, complimenting her skinny frame and brown hair. Her appearance gave her the air of a princess. This was her moment after all having worked for it for so long.
At eight o'clock she grabbed her small and stylish purse and began the walk to the restaurant, a Russian place named  Brats ye Sestras with fine cuisine from all over the globe. She walked the four blocks in under thirty minutes getting not so pure looks from the men as they passed and looks of jealousy from the women. She is on top of the world.
She entered through the front door and completely skipped the line waiting to get in, walking right up to the large Russian native bouncer who grinned when he saw her.
"Ohlekh! Kak dyellah, ye braht?" The woman asked loudly almost strutting with excitement. She is so close she can feel it.
"Huhrowshuh! Stareewihneh xdateh tebs, Sestra Maria." They kissed each other on the cheek and Marie walked straight in and to the back table where other markable examples of the of beauty sat, male and female.
"Zdrastfetyeh, Braht ye Sestras!"
"Hello Marie."
She sat and they talked until no light came from the sky. When it did the left Oleg in charge and got into their cars. The brothers and sisters drove and drove until they reached a small town in New Jersey. They stopped at one house and Marie left by herself and walked around for three hours until she came across a young teen. Marie barred her massive canine teeth showing their true points and walked towards the girl.
When Marie got back to the cars there was a tear in her dress and and blood all over her chin. The male by the name of Nicholi spoke "Now you are truely our Sestra, Marie"

I Am Legend

Robert Neville looked out over the new people of the earth. He knew he did not belong to them; he knew that, like the vampires, he was anathema and black terror to be destroyed. And, abruptly, the concept came, amusing to him even in his pain. ... Full circle. A new terror born in death, a new superstition entering the unassailable fortress of forever.

I am legend.

By Richard Matheson

Your Memories

The boy gritted his teeth. He was trying his best to ignore the insults being flung at him as he walked. The road was cloudy but sun still shone through. The other boys walked along behind poking and prodded the freak of existence before them. The first boy wore a orange sweater and jeans and appeared to be no older than 10 or 11. The others were the same age and wore different clothes as they walked along the street with the Victorian buildings over looking. 
Harrison is what they called the loner. Jeering and laughing at they became frustrated by his ability to hold his temper and finally began throwing rocks at him. They mostly missed but the biggest and the obvious leader landed one right on the back of his head knocking Harrison forward onto the ground. The gang rushed in to laugh at his "clumsiness."
When they got Harrison was bleeding ever so slightly on the back of his shaved head and was red in the face with anger. The leader was the first to get there when Harrison reached out grabbing his hand between both of his own. The larger boy tried to dodge it so as to push him down once more but was too slow.
When Harrison's hands were firmly placed on the leaders and he whispered the boys name. "Billy, I see you." Every muscle in both their bodies tensed to their full strength and fell to the ground. Harrison had barely settled when he sprung to his knees over Billy, who moaned with pain as he regained consciousness. Harrison placed his hand over his heart and both their bodies tensed once again, this time Billy seized up and shook on the ground.
Harrison struggled to sort out his mind's new memories as he stared blankly drooling up at the onlooking boys. They were in shock and knew no course of action but to run and run they did, in all directions. Billy finally stopped seizing and simply left consciousness falling into a pseudo coma as Harrison's mind simply basked in the light and pain of Billy's home life and upbringing. Finally Harrison sorted through and rose unsteadily trying to remember which set of thoughts were his own.
Billy screamed in his asking pleaded to be put back to get out. Harrison silenced him through sheer force of will. He leaned back over Billy's body and placed his hand on his head and focused. The two seized violently but Harrison remained standing this time. Billy's thoughts left his mind and freeing him from the pain he inflicted by his undisciplined thoughts in these actions. Billy awoke startled and coughing and watched Harrison casually stroll away.

Guiltless

Guiltless you are not today,
But unsuspecting anyway.
You attacked that man,
With all your might,
Didn't even give him,
A chance to fight.
It was over in seconds,
Your death warrant signed,
In another mans blood.
For he had brothers,
Who would put it on the line,
The warriors path,
They would take,
For guiltless you are not today.

Something beautiful

The suns beam moved to just the right angle that it shined right at his eyelids. He stretched his arms and rose to the rhythmic crash of the water. He rubbed his eyes as everything around him came into focus. The bright sun engulfed everything in brilliant and vivid light. he looked over the unfinished wood railing toward the peacefully crashing light brownish blue water. 
He glanced at the girl curled into a ball facing away from the man, on the lawn chair her, her smooth legs bare all the way up to her khaki, skin tight, short shorts and a skin tight sky blue T-shirt showing her hour glass shape and and her skinny figure. He couldn't help but wish he could hold her. 
He walked lightly and softly off the deck into the bright and hot sun light that beat down on him the thick and heavy humidity hung on his skin as he walked to the dock a few short feet away. When he finally reached the end of the football field length dock he pulled his knife out of his khaki pants and laid it on the table. He did not wear a shirt and his body was heavily tanned and had various scars his abdomen marked with a six pack and slim peck muscles. His back would ripple with muscle movement with every action.
He pulled the lines of three fishing lines on the dock and reeled them in disappointed that they didn't catch anything while he slept. He leaned over the rough and weathered railing. Judging by how the sun was directly overhead he determined that it was noon. He had slept just under seven hours. He watched a jet ski speed across and wind itself around the massive lake.
He felt a padding of feet coming down the dock, but it wasn't human it was a dog of some sort. He turned around to see a large golden retriever coming down the dock wagging its tail the whole way. He walked toward the dog and it practically attacked him with wet and sloppy kisses. He herded the dog back up to the cabin. after ten minutes of walking he reached the front porch of the small ranch house and walked inside the dog on his heels. He went into the kitchen and pulled out an uncooked chicken and threw it to the dog which it tore apart.
Afterward he began heating up the charcoal grill outside as the redhead sleepily walked up. Freckles covered her face and her blue shirt clung to her skin accenting her every curve from her belly button to her slim shoulders and her breasts below in similar proportion. Her feet were bare foot and her blue eyes peircing his soul with its innocence. 
The ground made subtle vibrations and a soft boom rolled across the water. The guy looked toward its source on the opposite side of the lake. The dark and huge clouds poured of their rain shrouding the horizon under it. 
"Hey Aaron." The beauty called. Aaron put out the coals and covered the grill then walked towards the girl.
He called out hello to her asking if she slept well. They walked together toward the dock and stood talking for over a hour watching the line of rain move across the lake. Finally it reached the dock with rain all over the deck and the two who stood on it. Laughing and giggling the two raced down the dock toward the house and the girl tripped Aaron and continued running now both thoroughly soaked. 
"Becky you hurt my ankle!" She came back slowly and poked at him once and he just moaned. She grabbed his muscular shoulder to help him up but he rolled over grabbing her rolling her onto her back and the two wrestled playfully for what seemed to be forever. He finally gained the upper hand and sat over her hold her arms down over her head the rain still pouring down on his body.
Looking down at Becky he could see her bra through her wet shirt and began to feel a new aspect to the yearning he had for her. He visibly looked up and down her body tracing her curves then at her face seeing her stare straight into his eyes biting her lip nervously. Finally he gave in to the urges and kissed her passionately.
They pulled themselves from each other when lightning struck too close for comfort and they went inside the cabin. The moment they were in the door they began stripping each other eagerly dripping water onto the carpet and tile. They didn't even make it to the bedroom before Becky tripped mid-kiss pulling them both to the floor. 
Their naked bodies writhed as one and they moaned together. The love struck pair continued their ecstasy for hours.